Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
