apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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