God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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