I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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