friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I love you. Go after that dick
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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