Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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