yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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