they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Randomize
