I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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