What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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