I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
