Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I need a beard to bite.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
