Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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