you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
