Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
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