I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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