yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
someone get that fucking seahorse.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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