if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
