Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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