I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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