their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Just fell off a train. Bad.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
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just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
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I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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