just come out here and I will go home with you...
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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