she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
