love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
