Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
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