I just made out with a guy for $7.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
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