I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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