why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
My liver just had a heart attack.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
