U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
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