I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
