there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Randomize
