Where is the hickey?
Tell her she can't have a vagina
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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