Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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