I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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