dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
