Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I need mimosas to revive my soul
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
