Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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