uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
