Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
bring money and cleavage
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
