He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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