Dual....:-)
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
