STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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