Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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