yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
My ATM looks so different sober.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize