I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize