It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
