You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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