Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Randomize
