Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
