Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize