I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
