For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I want her autograph on my taint
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
